First Love

How to Fill the Inner Void and Need for Love

Is love painful and a struggle?

Do you long to fill whole, loveable, desirable and wanted inside?

Have you been searching for love in all the wrong faces and places?

The Need for Love is Normal

The need for love, acceptance and significance is wired into all of us. Your needs are not strange or wrong but a normal part of how God has designed you.

You are made in God's image and like God you are created for relationship.

John Chapter 4:7 -18, 23-30

A woman, a Samaritan, came to draw water. Jesus said, "Would you give me a drink of water?" (His disciples had gone to the village to buy food for lunch.)

9The Samaritan woman, taken aback, asked, "How come you, a Jew, are asking me, a Samaritan woman, for a drink?" (Jews in those days wouldn't be caught dead talking to Samaritans.)

10Jesus answered, "If you knew the generosity of God and who I am, you would be asking me for a drink, and I would give you fresh, living water."

11-12The woman said, "Sir, you don't even have a bucket to draw with, and this well is deep. So how are you going to get this 'living water'? Are you a better man than our ancestor Jacob, who dug this well and drank from it, he and his sons and livestock, and passed it down to us?"

13-14Jesus said, "Everyone who drinks this water will get thirsty again and again. Anyone who drinks the water I give will never thirst—not ever. The water I give will be an artesian spring within, gushing fountains of endless life."

15The woman said, "Sir, give me this water so I won't ever get thirsty, won't ever have to come back to this well again!"

16He said, "Go call your husband and then come back."

17-18"I have no husband," she said.

"That's nicely put: 'I have no husband.' You've had five husbands, and the man you're living with now isn't even your husband. You spoke the truth there, sure enough."..........................

23-24"It's who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration."

25The woman said, "I don't know about that. I do know that the Messiah is coming. When he arrives, we'll get the whole story."

26"I am he," said Jesus. "You don't have to wait any longer or look any further.".......
28-30The woman took the hint and left. In her confusion she left her water pot. Back in the village she told the people, "Come see a man who knew all about the things I did, who knows me inside and out. Do you think this could be the Messiah?" And they went out to see for themselves.

Love Needs Gone Astray

Without God at the centre of our lives, we try and meet our love needs in other ways. We look to people, recreation, drugs, work, sex, and other pursuits to help us feel whole and happy.

It is God's desire and purpose for us to realise that our ways are not meeting all our needs. He wants us to give Him a chance and discover for ourselves, just how fulfilling His love can be.

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An educational resource for women of faith preparing for dating and marriage relationships and those recovering from a break up or divorce

The Source of Love

God wants each of us to experience relationships in the way that He designed them to be. This means we give up trying to do things our own way.

The empty place inside was not designed to be filled first by human relationships. The God of Heaven and Earth is the the source of love and our life. He displayed how much He loved us and how He can meet all our needs through the life of His Son, Jesus Christ.

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How Will I Know?

Meeting Our Needs

When Jesus met the woman at the well, He spoke about her longing and her thirsts. When He mentioned how many times she had been married, it was not to condemn her but to show her how she had been trying to fill that void.

When she realised what Jesus was talking about and how well He knew her, she asked that she might experience what it would be like to feel whole and complete inside.

God's Desire

Jesus was not offering her a one way relationship. He pointed out that God also desired to have a deep and living relationship with her. He wanted a heart relationship. Not a relationship built on religion, or a long list of do's and don'ts.

He desired a relationship that was transparent, honest, truthful and from the heart. The exact desire that dwells in the inner most parts of every human being.

A Brand New Life

This knowledge was so overwhelming for the woman that she left her water pot behind and went to tell others about Jesus.

Perhaps leaving the water pot was her way of leaving her old ways of meeting her needs behind. Instead of looking to men to feel whole she was now focused on the Source of love.

If you give a God a chance, you too can experience this life changing event. Knowing God as the source of all your needs, you will have greater freedom to build the right type of relationships with others and find new meaning to your life.